Tuesday, May 31

> Bad day..

Yesterday, i realised i've a cut on my gum and it hurts badly. During lecture, 2 nails of mine broke and i had to cut the remaining 8 short. I wanted to go for a manicure session really soon. Then, my pencil case burst, causing a little hole. Without caution, it will just tear apart. Given my rough behaviour, i wonder how long it can last. The worst thing took place when my pair of flats decided to snap while i was in school. I had a terrible time dragging my right feet to and fro. I gave up and walked barefooted around. Fortunately, Wayne had an extra pair of slippers in the car, so i borrowed it from him. After school, we went down to TM in search of a new pair of flats followed by a dinner.

Today, ive caught a bad flu and it irritates me like totally. In addition, my skin's peeling and it looks really awful.

What's wrong ?!?!

sealed-with-a-kiss < 8:39:00 pm

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Sunday, May 29

> Just another Saturday.

Kenny asked me out for a movie this evening after his presentation. Of course i agreed, its been a really long time since we met. Have i told you? He's my best god-brother ever. I remember spending 2 valentine's day together, often meeting up at Katong or for a meal, and the only gifts i'll get for him are t-shirts. wahhaha.

Anyway, i asked David along cos i happened to see him online. We caught Monster-In-Law at 2320hours at Plaza Singapura together with Lyn and Kev. The movie is darn funny, 3.5 stars im giving.

Met David earlier first because Kenny havent end his presentation yet. Shopped around, accompanied him for a hair cut followed by a dinner. I met many people i didnt thought i will see. Saw Chewlian and her boyfriend in Far East, saw Edwin while leaving Far East as he was walking towards there, he didnt see me though. Then i saw Samuel at Plaza Singapura, it was like years since i met him.

After the movie, Kev, David, Kenny and I took a cab to Katong Shopping Centre while Lyn left for home. I went to meet the usuals at the ktv and went for supper aftermath whereas the rest went to play billiard.

I just got home and im going to take a bath soon. Im really tired and i need a good sleep. Feeling a little depressed because somebody just promised me something again. And i know for sure, he wont make the promise come through because its been like so many times he promised to date me out which he never did again. Liar.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 3:51:00 am

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Tuesday, May 24

> First day of Year 2.

School resumes today. Im now in the Junior year. Oh wow, how time flies. In addition, my meatless diet commences today as well, i had vegetables for lunch and dinner, how does that sound?

First day of school was darn boring. I was really tired and dozed off a couple of times during lecture. The only thing that perks me up is to see my friends in school once again. No idea why, but i saw a hell load of friends, couldnt stop saying Hi and Bye.

In the bus to school, Mark boarded up the bus and i accompanied him to get his notes printed out in IT school. On our way there, i saw Meiting. While we were about to leave the lab and he accompanied me back to Business school, i saw David, Alvin, Wayne and Cinead. At the entrance of Business school, i saw Weikiat (Grace's boyfriend). While making my way to the the lecture theatre, i saw Iylia and Weikeat, both freshies i knew at Sentosa yesterday.

Met Jason (another freshie from HTM) for lunch together with Kelly and her friend. Saw Ashley and said hi.

I guess im not in the mood to resume my studies, not at the moment just yet. I did not pay much attention to my lecturers today, was practically dozing off and building sandcastles in the air. Im giving myself only 1 week to pack up my heart and start being studious once again. I do not have much time to lose. Competition is far too high, darn it. I just found out that Pascal has gotten a GPA of 3.8 and got in to the Directors'Honours List. Im jealous! I wanna get into that list too! Boo.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 11:19:00 pm

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Monday, May 23

> SLs outing to Sentosa

Sentosa was darn happening today. I guess majority of the people there at the beach are from TP. My clique and i were over at Sunsetbay whilst the others are at Palawan. I had a great time, whats new anyway? I always have great fun when im out with the BSC people. This time, 3 other freshies joined us. We became friends and had a great time too. -nods

Beach volleyball, playing monkey in the sea, kayaking, Captain's ball, eating, more beach volleyball. Fun, fun and more fun! The only thing that dampens our mood was that Huat's shades were missing, stolen in fact. But our cheerful selfs regained while we made our way out of Sentosa, heading to town in a giant taxi which was filled with all 13 of us. Had dinner at Burger King Cine while Yuping, Zhenjie and Eddie came to join us.

Im nicely browned once again but my knees are peeling. I wanna go sentosa with em more and play more volleyball before i can join my sister and the TPVB people at Sunsetbay.

Met the usuals by chance outside Cine while we were about to leave, so Juan gave me a lift home together with Bape. Thank you so much sweetie.

Im super worned out at this moment and the dreadful thing is that school's starting tomorrow. Lecture commences at 1500hours but i have a make-up lecture to attend at 1100hours. Guess i'll be turning in early, bringing along all the happy moments i had at Sentosa today. I couldnt stop laughing, playing and fooling around. I can proudly say that they are wonderful people who never ever made me depressed. No matter what they do nor what they say, my heart always feel so light and overjoyed. This is the kind of feeling i wish to have everytime im out with my pals and they have successfully achieved it.

But they say that happy moments doesnt last long. I do hope with a sincere heart that my friendship with em will continue to blossom with more fun and excitements, like a never ending circle. love.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 10:52:00 pm

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Saturday, May 21

> 18th birthday.

Orientation is finally over, a few more days to school reopen. I can now proudly say, BUSINESS SCHOOL ROCKS! We won the overall champion and 2 other matches. I was quite upset after the dragonboat race because i felt that i let the team down. I have totally no strength right after UP 10 but i still put in my all all the way. It was only till after the second 100 metre, i really couldnt take it anymore. =( We got in third in the end.

Zhenjie bought a cake and 4 birthday girls celebrated our birthdays in the LT. I love fruit cake! weeeeee. Aftermath, i popped over to Ling's place to change into a more comfortable tshirt and oversized slippers before heading back to Tampines Mall to meet up with the others. Zhenjie, Weishen, Ling, Lester, Eileen, Priscilla and i caught The Amityville horror. Good catch, nice storyline, 4 stars!

The movie ended at about 0130, Lester drove Zhenjie, Ling, Weishen and i to Zhenjie's place. Ate supper, slacked awhile, played 2 rounds of mahjong and Lester drove me home. I was freaking tired.

And that sum up my birthday. Though it seems like any other day, but im still happy. Because at least, my friends are there with me from 0730 right up to 0330. And that's 20 hours! Wow.

I would also like to say many thanks to the Sls, main com, prog com and freshies who wished me happy birthday or sang birthday songs for me, and also to Alex, Nicky, Bruce, Jennifer, Derek, Renjie, Sis, Jinli, Samantha, Leanne, Shalyn, Jiawei, Alicia, Chewlian, Eugene, Amos, Yiling, Jackson, Leroy, Hk, Jingmin, Jasimin, Perry, Jingping, Lina, Alvin, Terence and Alan for the birthday wishes. Last but not least, special thanks to Raymond Hsiao, Zhiyong and Ah Kiam for delibrately asking around for my number just to wish me a happy birthday. I was really touched. Thank you so much. Love.

I would be celebrating my birthday with the usuals later with just a simple BBQ.

To end this, i would also like to say, Happy birthday Angie and Ah Kiam!

sealed-with-a-kiss < 1:54:00 pm

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Friday, May 20

> Im Eighteen.

Hickery dickery dock;
The mouse ran up the clock;
The clock strikes 12;
The mouse fell down;
Hickery dickery dock.

As the clock strike 12, i wish myself a very happy 18th birthday. It was a long wait, but who cares? No one, really. Thanks to people who sent me birthday messages or gave me a call, or via msn. Thanks Ling, ZhenJie, Andy, Yongxin, Grace, Dave, David, Lucas, Sabrina, Eunice, Marcus, Kenny, Jackson, Lijuan and friends in genting, Ah Hong, Meiting and etc.

Now i can finally go clubbing without borrowing IC or trying to sneak in through the VIP queue, i can buy cigarettes without hestitating and worrying of being caught, i can watch M18 movies and not get stucked at NC16, i can make 1900 hotlines without seeking parental consent (this is total bullshit i know), i can purchase alcoholic drinks (though i do not drink), i can get tattoos legally blah blah and blah blah. Period.

Orientation was okay, like as expected. My role as a SL brought me both happiness and sadness. Shant elaborate further, i hope i have a great time tomorrow. Taking part in the dragonboat race, i hope i wont capsize cos i freaking hell cant swim. Lol.

To be honest, im feeling really down and moody. I remember last year, though i was super heartbrokened because my boyfriend ditched me (yayyayyay u people might say, its my retribution to get ditched aye? whatever.), but my handphone couldnt stop ringing, it isnt the case right now. Oh well, who cares? Nobody loves me, everybody hates me.

Last of all, Happy birthday happy birthday, happy birthday to ME!

sealed-with-a-kiss < 12:23:00 am

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Wednesday, May 18

> Liars go to hell.

Liars. I hate liars. The world is full of liars. LIARS!

sealed-with-a-kiss < 11:42:00 pm

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> Reminiscing my Secondary school days.

Right, im like so bored right now. My pals are all on their way to Genting. They would prolly reach there in another 2 hours time. Bon voyage my dear(s), have fun and take care!

Been sleeping close to 0600 daily and its quite difficult to fall asleep right now. Though ive a lecture to attend tomorrow at 1000, im very reluctant to go to bed, so i'll just pick up some secondary school pictures i can find in my computer and upload in here.

All pictures are taken when im in Secondary 4. I miss Gmethss and all the people there, especially the infamous Faith 4/3. You guys rock and i miss all of you so darn much. Meet up soon!!


My usual clique in school.


With my Chinese/Form teacher for 2 whole years. She's wonderful!


Im always wearing the school sweater cos i think it looks good covering the school uniform.


Taken on graduation day.


My wonderful class. Spot me!


On National Day.

I'll upload more pictures when im in the lower secondary when i have the time and mood to do so.

Gmethss has brought me a hell lot of joy and fun, add in a little sadness and anger. No one love school as much as Faith 4/3 do i bet. We make the most fierce teacher enjoy and smile in class, we were so enthusiastic in every event, we take part in almost everything and everyone in class were so united.

I love Gmethss, that's where i learn many many valuable things money cannot buy. I learnt how to curb my temper, i learnt to be more patient and less arrogant. I learnt that at times, i shouldnt talk too much. I learnt to be more mature and study hard because the future lies in our own palm. I learnt to be less sensitive towards people, i learnt how friendship could blossom and die at the very next moment. I learnt how to cherish things but i too learnt many vulgarities and picked up smoking. And i too learnt how to skip lessons and got myself in trouble. I learnt how to bicker with teachers who are darn irritating like my Geog teacher, who i unfortunantely couldnt recall her name outta sudden.

I cannot deny the fact that i was notorious and very unliked by many in school. I misbehave a lot and acted like an ah lian. But i can proudly say that i am no longer like that, because ive grown up and matured. Maybe not really matured yet, but i do know whats right and wrong. And i do know that violence and acting fierce and scared by many isnt something nice.

But in reality, perception is a very difficult issue to handle. Once someone perceive me as a person with many negative traits, its very hard to convince them that ive changed and do have positive traits in me. I do hope nonetheless, that those that hated and disliked me will have another view of me right now, because i know for sure im not very much like before. And i would like to apologise to all, my friends, my enemies, for whatever ive done to hurt you people.

Goodnight.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 1:04:00 am

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Sunday, May 15

> Im browned!

Sis and i hit Sunsetbay this morning to get a good tann. Im nicely browned, or so i thought, but yet to perfection because the naughty me decided to stay in the shelter after tanning under the scorching sun for a good an hour and a half. My sis is red-ed, like a lobster, really burnt. But her tann lines are so beautifully visible and im jealous. -pouts. I wore the wrong set of bikini today, this bikini of mine creates really thick tann lines which i dont really like. bahh.

Been a long time since i met up with the Sentosa usual volleyball people. Sportmag Singapore readers might be able to spot my sister and i in the next issue, i guess.

We went down to town to do some light shopping. She got me a pair of brown reef beach slippers for my birthday and i love it. I got myself a pair of brown shorts from Topshop. Brown is a lovely colour. =D

Drop by Suntec cos my sister wanna buy something, then head down to Bugis to get more things. Its always the case. Whenever sis and i go to town or something, our cash will all be spent on food, and nets spent on material stuff. I knew i would be darn broke after today, i just knew it.

Im really tired cos i slept at 6am this morning and woke up at about 10am. Was out supper at Geylang You Tiao Da Wang with the usuals. I need some beauty sleep and rest but im not gonna do so just yet because holidays are coming to an end and i wanna make super full use of what is left. So later, i'll be heading down to ktv with the usuals, again.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 10:38:00 pm

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Tuesday, May 10

> Great day out.

My aim in Sentosa today was to be nicely browned, but no, that didnt happen. The sun was still scorching bright when i left the house, but the sky turned grey once i stepped into Harbourfront Centre. It soon started to drizzle once i reach Sunsetbay. It wasnt such a good day to tann after all. It started pouring after a while. The tide was pretty high today, and my condolences to that malay boy's family. He got drowned at Siloso, which was really near where i was soaking myself in the sea. That explains why the numerous number of police car. I got a little traumatized when i heard about the death of that poor boy. I was so close to death, as in, i might be the one washed away by the strong current. Thank God im safe and sound.

The weather was a real disappointment. So i made my way to town to meet up with Huat and Ling. We caught House of Wax together with Delong and Phyllis. The movie was great, not as gross as Creep but yea, got freaked out here and there. Giving it 4 stars. Not for the weak hearted though, i got shocked twice.

The movie ended at about 9.30pm. Made our way to N.Y.D.C Heerens and met up with Zhen Jie, Yuping and Li Ang. Joshua was working today. Had a great time laughing at one another.

Despite the initial disappointment of not getting nicely browned, i had a great day nevertheless. Looking forward for Thursday Seafood dinner with Derek and Tea Party on Friday. When school starts, i'll go on a two weeks meatless diet. Im determined, so my dear friends, please, encourage and support me.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 11:39:00 pm

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> You.

I wonder when can i ever see you again,
dont wanna see you through the monitor no more.
I wonder when can i ever attract you back again,
dont wanna live in the shadows of another no more.
I wonder when can your eyes be filled with my images once again,
dont wanna see another figure in your eyes no more.
I wonder when can i ever make your heart beat double again,
dont wanna be just another girl on the streets no more.

If destiny made us friends, and fate only forbid us to remain as friends, i rather we never knew. If we never knew each other, i would never love you, and you would never have a chance to hurt me. If we never saw each other, you would never have a chance to come across a girl who looks like her, and you would never be interested to know me.

Some says its a blessing though we couldnt be lovers, at least we're friends. But in this case, i rather we were never friends because it seems like now, we're just mere strangers. If i were to put it bluntly, i really regretted knowing you. Though i was really happy when we first knew each other, spend time talking and going out, but once the novelty sets out, i was suffocating inside, trying to comprehend the reason behind your every step.

Everything seems like just yesterday. You said you didnt want to be in a relationship, you said you enjoy your singlehood, you said you didnt want anymore commitments, you said your happy with the way life is. I could understand, and i could take it. But it doesnt seem like the case now, my intuition tells me your in love, in love with someone else, with someone new. A women's intuition is right most of the time, no?

I dont know why the sudden thought of this entry, i just want to let if off my chest. I shouldnt even be thinking of it right now, because a long time ago i said i'll forget and pretend that nothing ever happened, we were never in love with each other. But seeing you online, seeing you through my monitor, i couldnt possibly push my emotions back, i couldnt stop myself from thinking.

Enough.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 1:50:00 am

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Monday, May 9

>

Mothers' Day was just great. My family (except my brother) walked over to Marine Parade and had dinner at Sakura, Suki Sushi. The buffet was powerpack. Dad was the first to admit defeat, followed by mum then i. Sis came a little later so she was the last to stop eating.

Aftermath, mum, sis and i went for a little shopping at Parkway to buy all the essentials and some snacks. Ive been really pigging a lot. Got home at about 9pm and i fell asleep at 9.30. I woke up at 1pm just now and with simple calculations, that was about 16 hours of sleep. My goodness! -faints.

Been really eating a lot these days. Had dinner with Wayne and his family on Saturday at Tony Roma's. My tummy have been bulging since last week's dinner on Sunday whereby my family celebrated my parent's anniversary day. My tummy have not gone any flatter, but instead, grown even bigger.

Now, how am i gonna suntann at Sentosa tomorrow with my barbies? lol. I cant wait! Its been so long since i stepped into Sentosa, and so long since i met up with my barbies. Miss em so much!

Right, gonna have lunch and then watch dvd. Today's a homely day.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 1:17:00 pm

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Saturday, May 7

> Dancing is my passion.

The dance performance is finally over. I can now take a breather. It was good i must say, everyone had put in their best. Though a little bangings and wrong steps taken here and there, i guess the audience had a great time watching our dance. (i'll upload the pictures taken with the dancers as soon as Jennifer send em to me; and the video clip of our dances as soon as Simon send em to me, for which you may request i send it to you and that's if you have my msn email.)

I had a lot of back aches and blue-blacks all over me due to the intensive dance practice and rehearsals. Im in school most of the time this week, from morning to night time. Deprived of sleep, yes, plenty. Been eating a lot too. I guess i'll give myself a few days to pig all out and then start restricting myself with only vegetables. My no-meat-for-a-month-diet shall be implemented soon.

Its 1 more day to mother's day (i havent bought anything for her yet); 3 more days to sentosa with my barbies (yay! at long last); 6 more days to SL tea party (i can hardly wait); 12 more days to Business Orientation & my birthday eve; 13 more days to being 18 (im loving' it); 14 more days to celebration of my birthday with the usuals (bbq?); 17 more days to school reopen (year 2 sem 1).

Im going to work double hard this time in order to hit a GPA of 3.5 at least. Currently having a GPA of 3.29. Bahh, its really a lot of hardwork.

My passion for dancing accelerated greatly ever since i had to put in so much time and effort for that GEM concert. No, im not talking about the clubbing moves. And i can say proudly that, i do not know how to dance in clubs. Nothing to be ashamed of right? I love contemporary dance (ballet; modern) or even dances like salsa, jazz, chinese and all. I hope i would be able to learn all of em. Its like being the jack of all trade, master of none.

I would be meeting Wayne soon to hit town and get some gifts for our mums. Happy Mothers' Day to all lovely mothers. ilu mum!

sealed-with-a-kiss < 4:04:00 pm

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Monday, May 2

> Wrap a guy up in a large parcel sealed with a big ribbon as my birthday present.

While out shopping with mum yesterday afternoon, i asked her what she would be getting for my birthday. Her reaction was quick and clear, "a boyfriend". I was shocked for a moment, trying to double check what i heard was said from her mouth. Then i asked her why. She said that i should get a boyfriend soon so that there will be someone solely to pamper and take care of me. She then further asked me why am i still single after a year of break up, why isnt there any guys out there coming after me. Of course, i didnt know how to answer those questions, how would she expect me to answer her?

I believe the answer to her questions could not be answered by me, because i would like to know why either. Every time mum talks to me about getting a boyfriend, i'll feel kind of irritated. Its not the first time she urge me to get one though, the last time was in last November. She seems more excited than i am.

So in order to stop her from hurrying me to be attached, i told her that im pretty okay and happy with the way life is right now. Guys, are more or less bastards. And i know, im stereotyping over here, but yes, i still feel this way. I wanna have the best guy, the one who loves me more than i love him (though i still love him with all my heart and soul), and i would never ever wanna get involved with a guy, who is as hot-tempered as my dad. Booooooooooooo.

Mum then start telling me the pros of having a boyfriend. I've no idea what her problem was lah, i think she cant wait to see me get married off, she doesnt want me to be in the Lim family anymore! -pouts

But then again, it got me thinking real hard. When people ask me things like "no guys after you now meh?", i'll reply em "No, none at all" but they would not believe me. THEN WHY ASK?! But very often, its true that no guys are after me what, or at least, i do not feel it. Even if there is, the guy would most prolly be out just to cheat me lah. liars! Ive came across many many guys, maybe about 20 or 30 since i was in Secondary One, when the guy says he wanna woo me, but ended up having another girlfriend in just a couple of days. Im getting quite jaded of it. It always happen, and how would you expect me to believe in em again? Never.

I can further branch out from this topic, but i decided not to. I dont wanna feel depressed or crestfallen. Ive been feeling rather happy these days especially since i went to the chalet. Ive no idea why, but im totally glad about making new friends ever since SL camp. People that know me deeper within, would know that i dont really enjoy making new friends and ive been rather anti-social most of the time. That's because i do not trust people, and because i often trust the wrong person.

But i was proven wrong, because having known the BSC main/sub comm members really made my days great and wonderful. (For instance, mr ghostly zj, my slave ling, mr pincher huat, da pig sean, the hunter long etcetcetc) I somehow miss the chalet days, and i cant wait for the next one to be up (that's if Delong really decided to open another).

Getting way off the tangent aye? Maybe i should just end it. Will update more when ive more to talk about, relationships.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 3:21:00 pm

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Sunday, May 1

> New handphone !

I forgot to add on while posting an entry last night that my handphone went dead on me yesterday. It went retarded for awhile by adjusting the volume to the minimun without me pressing any buttons and then there was no way i could adjust it back to the maximum. After which, none of the buttons could work except for the on/off button.

And so, when i woke up this morning, or noon to be exact, i told my parent about it. Mum was reading the papers and she came across the Singtel page. In just a short 10 minutes (from telling em about my handphone to dad trying to revive it), i found myself walking to Parkway Parade with mum to purchase a new handphone, Samsung E810C. Yay! And that's one more thing struck off from my wishlist.

I wish my wishlist could all be fulfilled when my birthday comes. And of course, i know thats nonsense because i can never fulfill em on my own. (im trying to hint you humans right now, its on the left navigation. lallala)

Dinner was great, and i ate a lot. Feeling really bored right now, still thinking if i should join my friends to catch a movie in PS at 1245am. Im like so broke. bahhh.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 11:45:00 pm

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> Happy 23 years of blessed marriage, daddy and mummy! love!

The time now states 3.30am. This marks a new month, the month of May. I love May. There are 2 public holidays, its my parent's wedding anniversary month and of course, my birthday! weeeeeeeeeee..

I just emerged from a good warm bath straight after i got home from town. Met Wayne and caught a movie in the evening. Divergence. Im rating it 3 upon 5. Its kinda messy. Then we made our way down to town and shopped around. Had dinner at N.Y.D.C Heerens before meeting up with Juan and Bape at Party World. We sang from 10pm to 2am, my throat is feeling painful again. I hate to fall sick, and i cannot afford to fall sick because my dance performance is on the coming Friday. Its gonna be a hell of a busy week due to the intensive practices and rehearsals. After which, i can finally have a good long break and chill at Sentosa with my barbies. yay!

Tomorrow night, my family would be out for a good sumptious dinner to celebrate my parent's 23 years of marriage. (its either 22nd or 23rd, i cant really remember) 23 years of marriage wasnt at all easy and smooth. Of course, my parent had quite a few bad arguments with each other.

All i can say is that, i love my dad and mum. Though their thinking are a little outdated and quite traditional and conservative, and they do control me quite a lot, but its all for my own good and i really appreciated it. When i was 13, i had a police case. Dad and mum were really upset and disappointed in me and themselves. Dad even reproached himself for not taking good care of me and instead indulge in his many mid-night mahjong sessions. And because of that, he felt that he had a need to watch me even closely, hence stopped going out for mahjong games and really came home straight after work daily. Of course, i didnt like that.

Besides the fact that Dad is a really self-centred and temperamental man who has quite a high delusion of grandeur, a chauvinist i would say, he is a 101% good husband. He doesnt smoke, doesnt drink and doesnt womanize. The only bad thing would be that he is a mahjong addict. But i do not blame him for that, because that's his only past time and source of income. (My dad is retrenched, all he does at home is to shake leg, play with Ebony, feed Ebony, cleanes Ebony, mop/sweep the floor, cook rice, water the plants, washes the car, washes the dishes, watch tv, sleep and play pinball on my computer)

Mum is a lucky woman i could say. But my dad's a little too possesive though. Dad sets a lot of restrictions for my mum and she have no choice but to keep quiet and follow whatever shits my Dad says. Awww, so sad! And that's a lesson learnt, i'll never marry a guy who is so full of himself, no way!

In just 20 days, i'll be officially legal to purchase cigarettes, alcohol and Zouk-ing and Black-ing.

My head is rather heavy now, i think i need a rest. Goodnight.

sealed-with-a-kiss < 3:32:00 am

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* yours truly.

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